Somewhere in Beverly Hills
“I know you like cats, “said my client P___, “but you’re actually more dog-like.” She made this observation from the kitchen of a gaudy Beverly Hills mansion. We were on a commercial shoot.
“You’re so energetic and social,” she went on. I heard myself add “eager to please and A.D.H. D.” to the list.
I couldn’t argue with her, but secretly I was hurt. A dog? Something about being likened to a dog was insulting. Even coming from my dog-obsessed client.
I am a crazy sexy cat lady hear me ROAR! (Photographer: JEROME JAKUBIEC)
Now you dog lovers out there hold your horses before you start sending me nasty-grams. It’s because of my cats that I’ve developed an appreciation of the animal kingdom – dogs included.
Cats and dogs are different. One is not better than the other. But let’s face it, dogs are indiscriminate and needy. Dogs are goofy, drool, and – on occasion – eat their own shit.
Cats, on the other hand. Cats are independent, sophisticated, mysterious and discerning. Cats are complicated and strategic (some might call this manipulative and conniving).
Cats do what they want. They are who they are, take it or leave it. Yet we still love them. Well, some of us do.
Cats are confident. Dogs are, well, insecure.
Plus being cat-like is sexy right? Think about all the girls and woman who insist on dressing up as slutty cats on Halloween. Who doesn’t think cat woman is hot?
My most senior client confirmed my theory when he pulled me aside one day and told me if I wanted to get a guy, I had to stop blogging about cats. But I could blog about BEING a cat. That was acceptable.
A mid-town Manhattan conference room
Reviewing creative concepts with the clients I somewhat jokingly suggested we add some cats to our television spot (I suggest this at every possible opportunity).
“Cats are polarizing,” said my client J____.
“Well, so am I,” I replied.
Silence.
“Hey,” I said, “isn’t this where you’re supposed to assure me it’s not the case?”
And with that everyone let out the laughter they’d been struggling to hold inside.
Seems my desire to be cat-like was biting me in the ass. It is true cats are polarizing. The people who love them are fanatical and those who dislike them HATE them. No one is ambivalent.
I could be considered polarizing. I’m loud (so I’ve been told) and opinionated. I call it like I see it. People either find my directness refreshing and appreciate it, or run for the hills. Let’s just say, I usually make a statement.
I’d like to think I’m in good company. Angelina Jolie is a cat. She doesn’t care what people think of her. She’s mysterious, complicated and a home wrecker. According to one Sundance movie-maker this year, cats can be home-wreckers too.
Jennifer Anniston on the other hand is a dog. A lab even. She’s the all-American girl next door. Blond, cute and never ever controversial. She’s Wonder Bread to Angelina’s Pumpernickel.
Which would you rather be?
You might not love Wonder Bread but hating it seems extreme. It’s just there, formulated for the masses. Pumpernickel has character. It’s an acquired taste that some never acquire.
Madison Square Park on a winter morning
Walking to work I noticed a group gathered around particularly excited mutt making what can only be described as doggie snow angels. Everyone was amused and the dog couldn’t have been happier for the attention.
That’s when it hit me. While I had balked at the canine comparison, I couldn’t deny the similarities.
- Dogs are fun-loving free spirits that run into things head first without a thought. I’ll try (almost) anything once. I’m a bit of a young soul and yes, can be overly trusting (perhaps even naive)
- Dogs thrive off being the center of attention. I grew-up performing, and even now love speaking in front of large groups. I’m a ham (wait till you see my 40th birthday video!).
- Dogs are transparent. No deciphering required. When I’m happy I cannot contain my excitement. When I’m sad or mad, it’s written on my face for the world to see. It’s easy to know where I stand. I speak my mind.
- Dogs are affectionate. I’m pretty tactile myself.
- Dogs are loyal. As a Capricorn I’m nothing if not loyal (one of the few redeeming qualities for which my sign is known).
Geppetto & Frieda frolicking with best friend Emma (photo: Daniela Caride)
It’s easy to undervalue and dismiss what we have and put value on what we don’t. P___’s statement hit a nerve because it was based in truth. A truth I didn’t want to acknowledge. I wanted to be viewed as intelligent, mysterious and serious. Not a peppy entertainer.
Years ago my therapist told me that at the end of the day everyone wants the same thing in life. To feel lovable. I told her I thought that was a crock-of shit.
In retrospect, she might be on to something.
Perhaps there’s a little bit of doggie in all of us after all. And that’s okay with me.
Very interesting question and post! I consider myself to be more “cat-like” for sure..people are always telling me I’m “mysterious” haha..I don’t know about that, but I feel like something within me relates to the personality of cats more. I love all animals, but I just don’t feel the same connection with dogs.
I only met you in person once, but I definitely didn’t get the impression you were “more” a dog person (not that it would be a bad thing, like you pointed out.) On an unrelated note: You look gorgeous in that pic..LOVE the dress!
I think by being less outgoing and loud, people perceive that as mysterious even if you don’t see yourself that way. Guess that’s why no one seems ME that way! ha!
Thanks for the compliment – that’s from my 40th BIRTHDAY! I had a blast and need to write a post about that experience soon!
Thanks as always for the support and for taking the time to pots a comment!
Love it, Tamar! I don’t know that I’d like the comparison, either, life-long cat person that I’ve turned out to be, but there’s nothing wrong with being outgoing, friendly, enthusiastic, and a lot of other things that make others happy to be with us.
But now what do I make of my cats who have those qualities, which is most of the cats who’ve lived with me? They’ve even been known to make snow angels!
Lovely photos of you–in the black dress of course! You should write more often. I always enjoy.
Thanks Bernadette! I have a tough (and good) editor so writing often is a challenge! I also take forever to write! Need to work on writing more so that improves i guess!
I wanna see a cat snow angel!
Thanks for commenting! Are you planning on going to Blog Paws this time around?
T
Dogs drool, Cats rule.
Dogs have Masters, Cats have Staff.
Nuff said.
Oh no! I don’t wanna drool!!!!
=^^=
You look fab and all CAT! Don’t listen to what others say since they may be projecting their own agenda. There are dog-like cats (like my Siamese mancat) and cat-like dogs and that’s what makes a horse race.
Thanks Laya! You are the best!
T
OK….now…I believe I am a cat but..I am now not sure if that is supposed to be good or not lol
I guess it depends how much you need approval from others! LOL! Thanks for commenting!
T
I agree that there is probably a little dog in everyone, but there is probably a little cat in everyone too. I don’t agree that everyone wants to feel loveable – to feel loved yes but loveable just has a weird connotation to me – like a teddy bear is loveable. I think you are smart to want to be a cat. And to blog about cats. If you love cats and some guys can’t handle that then they aren’t the right guys anyway. My guy – he has no problem with the cat blogging.
Amy, I too balked at the thought of “loveable” for the exact same reasons you did. But I think what she was getting at was the idea that we all want to be loved (and are thereby validated as being loveable).
I LOVE that you have a cat-loving guy! Thanks as always for visiting and taking the time to comment!
T
i think i’m a half n half kinda gal, n i think u r too, tamar as i don’t know if i actually see u living with a dog lol
Might be too much competition for me. LOL!
Dogs are fun-loving free spirits that run into things head first without a thought…yes but when you are playing with cats they are fun-loving spirits too, who sometimes forget to look where they are going!
Dogs thrive off being the center of attention… I know some diva-like cats that require around the clock coddling and cuddling!
Dogs are transparent… Cats let you know what they want! Especially dinner!
Dogs are affectionate… I know a few cats who are the official greeters at the house, not the dog!
Dogs are loyal…cats choose who they want to be loyal to!
So it depends on how you look at it! You looked great in that stunning dress! Happy B-day! (and I wouldn’t have guessed 40!)
ps. I’m a Capricorn too! We’re always climbing up that dang mountain! So we’re not dogs or cats, we’re goats!
Ann – all WONDERFUL points you make! LOVE that you are a cappy too! Never thought of the entire “climbing up the mountain” aspect but it CERTAINLY feels that way!!! Thanks for the sweet compliment re: my age
T
While once in a blue moon I will meet a dog I make a connection with, I am a cat person through and through. They don’t smell when they get wet, they don’t drool all over me and they don’t hump my leg. They’re elegant and intelligent, and their aloofness and finickiness make them all the more alluring.
Love the dress!
Thanks Dawn (re: the dress). re the cat/dog thing – - i KNOW, ‘that’s why i was so offended originally. But i guess i must accept who i am and see the good in it right?!
Love this post! I’m definitely more cat like! I am a very acquired taste.
Ahhh, ANOTHER good point! I too am an acquired taste! One more in the “cat” category for me! tehe!
I actually TELL a lot of people that I’m a cat, and I don’t really give a rat’s *ss what they make of it. Even in my dating profile, the only thing in the “About Me” section is “Je suis le chat noir”. Anyone who doesn’t appreciate the cat stuff is on my black list.
To my close friends and family, i frequently meow as well…a general expression of satisfaction, approval, or just a greeting. I can’t get close to someone who won’t meow back.
I think some cats can have dog-like traits and vice versa, so it’s not a completely polarized situation. I only connect with dogs who act like cats i.e. mild mannered, don’t drool, isn’t wildly eager to meet new people, etc.
Well Gata, per my post. If you ARE a cat or act LIKE a cat that’s apparently more acceptable than LIKING cats!
I love that you meow though…i have been told i growl and purr…
Don’t mind dogs but not their drools and smell if they don’t bathe in time. Cats clean themselves and only drool when sleeping with opened mouths.
Yes, Captain Jack Sparrow HAWK has only one eyeball thus the name and the remaining good one eyes his world like a hawk!
i LOVE Captain Jack Sparrow HAWK now!!! So happy I met him/you!
Like Amy, I think we all have cat-like and dog-like traits in us. I enjoyed your post. I am definitely a cat person, as I would not like to live with a dog, but I get along with the dogs of my friends and relatives quite well.
Thanks Karen Jo! I appreciate doggies…they are DEF different though….still, it’s funny that dogs are so popular but i dont wanna be told i’m like one!
According to the description, I am a cat. I am independent and I like to do what I want. I know I’m not a dog, I don’t drool !!
Your therapist was right, we all want to feel lovable.
NB: I love the dress too
I am jealous you are a CAT! I wanna be a CAT!!!!!
Who is NB?!
Can you be a catdog person? I own up to being goofy, will make the spontaneous snow angel, and yes, have my insecure moments. Yet, I like to observe without spectacle, which I guess is mysterious too.
Congrats on the viewer ship, this is a great blog and love you give a shout out to us dog people that try to understand cats, and “what they do”.
E
you are DEF a cat-dog…i wish i could be more cat! LOL! and i often quote you btw, it will DEF make it into a blog post soon. “umm….they are following me around from room to room….is that what cats do?” ! LOL xo
PS – i still have your COAT! and a bottle of wine for yOU!
Um….check it out babe. The ORIGINAL Catdog! LOL! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CatDog
Oddly, I almost used a photo of the catdog in the post!
Oh, what a great compliment to be compared to a dog! They may eat their own hit on occasion, but they are not indiscriminate and needy. They are simply sooooooooo happy all the time. It would be great to be that happy on a regular basis. Something to be achieved after years of meditation, maybe. Imagine Nirvana 24/7. There you go!
Love the pictures of my doggies!!!! Thanks!!!
Not sure why but your comment was in the SPAM folder! Good thing I checked – PHEW!
I like your perspective (as always) Daniela – thanks for letting us use your photo! IT IS pure joy isn’t it?!
NIKITA: Since Daddy is turning 51 on Saturday, and I’m gonna be 13 that day, I showed him your great post, hee, hee! ;-D
KIRIL: I love it! Way back in the late 90′s, back before Nikita was born, and his mentor was my companion, along with a wonderful Black & White Dog whom I carried to the overnite vet, for his journey to Rainbow Bridge, when he became too old to move anymore, I had a T-Shirt that read…”Real Men Admit They Love Cats!
I’ve always wished I could find another since I wore that one out. ;-D
I’ve been blogging about Cats, and Nikita has, um, been my Co-Blogger, since 2002, until I gave him his own blog in January 2010 (I know, I’m slow on the uptake!), and though our involvement in the CatBlogging Community has evolved, and has grown, the last 5 years, our unique brand of doing so has not led to the end of my Bachelorhood (Though it did finally lead to a woman entering our lives, last summer – Elvira Mistress of Pussydom, Tortie Kitten Extraordinaire! Hee, hee!), or to more than 150 visitors a day to the blog at the most, and that only a few times.
To most of the non-blogging people I’ve told about Meowsings, even people at shelters, and pet stores, it’s hard to accept that there is something about Cats online that is more than LOL! Cats, or YouTube videos.
Despite my encouraging them to visit, and let me know of events, nothing ever came of it, even after Nikita blogged about a 2 hour visit to Pussy & Pooch in Long Beach, and sent them copies of our photos. ;-D
Whether it’s the Cat doing the blogging, or the human, Cat Bloggers, and Critter Bloggers in general, are part of an evolving niche in the Blogosphere, one that Industry types are finally taking notice of which accounts for a convention like BlogPaws sprouting up last year.
If that’s not a sign of Acceptability, I don’t know what is. ;-D
I’ve yet to meet any of the SoCal Cat Bloggers I know, even the few I know of in my backyard, or LA, but I plan to be at BlogPaws in August.
You just keep on, keeping on, with your blog, you are doing fine, and should be proud of its success. ;-D
Thanks Daddy Kiril & Nikita Cat! Kiril, you already know we are HUGE fans of men who like cats here! And think it’s WONDERFUL how loyal you are to cats and loud and proud of your love of felines! The kitties are lucky to have you as an advocate! Don’t stop all the wonderful things you do for the cats! Thanks for visiting and posting! Not sure if I’m going to BlogPaws yet but if I do we will finally meet!
i love that photo. so oscar fabulous. i think that being in advertising, this calls for one who is sociable, creative and outgoing. i think those are great traits to have.
i’m friendly and sociable, but personally, i prefer being in a small intimate setting. i get extremely anxious being around a large group of people. i can also be very honest, frank and a bit snarky, which many people don’t appreciate. but i love my friends who do
Thanks Yasmine! I joked that the only other place I could ever wear it would be the Oscars! LOL!
Great post Tamar! I’ve always had a special affinity for cats especially since I don’t have a high need to be liked by other people. I’m pretty much “take-me-as-I-am”. BTW – you make a lovely black kitty.
Yes I def need more of the “take me as I can” attitude! Thanks for the compliment
What a cool concept!!
I’ve always been a cat, have always known I was a cat… but I never really took it that one step further, thinking about who might be a dog. (I mean, when kids call someone a “dog”? Let’s just say they’re not talking about stuff like being loyal and affectionate.) But it’s really an interesting and fun way to look at ourselves!
I’d add being introverted and more of a loner to the list of cat-like traits (as opposed to the dog’s extroversion and sociability), and being able to maintain a sense of serenity (rather than needing to be in perpetual motion). Each wonderful in its own way, yeah?
Oh, and I have to ask… when wearing your gorgeous black frock, were you hiding a gently-swooshing long tail, or a stubby little wagging one, beneath the voluminous folds of that skirt? ;D
Funny, I have been working on the ability to be still (more serene). Perhaps for me being more cat-like is an end goal! LOL! Absolutely they are all traits that have their positive and negative aspects.
As for the tail…I’ll never telL! LOL!
Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment!
siamese cats are loud. they call for attention too, especially for food. they love the pampering and, when still kittens, are active as hell.
you could still be a cat-person XD
Oh yes! How did I forget about Siamese cats! Great point!
I’m not a fan of labels, and “dog-like” and “cat-like” sound an awful lot like labels to me. You’re an outgoing, direct, social and high energy person who loves cats. Not to mention that you’re gorgeous and warm-hearted. Who cares what others think
!
Awwww thanks Ingrid
Like everyone else, I love the dress.
I think the labels of “catlike” and “doglike” are stereotypes. Although I’ve yet to meet a catlike dog, I know many doglike felines. I live with one–super friendly, greets you at the door, wants to talk about your day. My catlike cats are a little wary of him
That’s hysterical Marie…about your cat-like friends being suspicious of your friendly cat! LOL! I have heard of some smaller dogs, like Pomeranians being catlike?
THanks RE: the dress. It was a big 40th BDAY splurge. Not sure it will be ever worn again unless I get invited to the OSCARs…you never know! LOL!
Meow! From the photos only – you’re all cat! Love those shots! hugs and purrs!
THANKS SUSAN! =^^=
I love you for both your Cat and Dog qualities because I love all animals. But in my opinion you are more Cat like than Dog like. And that is a complement, but being a Cat person, you already knew that.
xoxo
Awwwww THANKS GRACEY
=^^=
you need a COLLIE in your life. i love dogs, cats, rabbits, hamsters, horses, cows…….and i would be happy to be considered to be like any of them because all of them have so many better qualities than a lot of humans i run into — lol!!
Right a COLLIE, THAT’S WHAT”S MISSING! LOL
Love it! Particularly…
“Jennifer Anniston on the other hand is a dog. A lab even. She’s the all-American girl next door. Blond, cute and never ever controversial. She’s Wonder Bread to Angelina’s Pumpernickel.”
A brilliant assessment. I mean, I like labs. They’re cute. Just don’t expect me to commit.
LOL! Thanks kitty! Glad you liked! =^^=
Love this! I’m outgoing like a dog, but also very quirky and odd like a cat. I think I might be a combination, but I like to think of myself as more cat-like.
Thanks Angie! =^^=
Meow!
love the post….
I grew up with dogs.. didn’t become a cat fanatic until kitty #1!
I believe I have a bit of both in me.. the good, the bad and the ugly!! LOL
LOL! love it! Thanks as always for following and commenting!
I am a cat. I LOVED your post. So did my human. She’s gonna come over here and post herself. I refuse to speak for her. She can be quite lazy.
We cats are loving and all that stuff dogs can be–except eating the poo part-if we choose to rise from our nap when the human enters the room…
Noir
PS. Thanks for visiting my blog!
Hi Noir! Thanks so much for visiting and commenting over here on I HAVE CAT!
Oh my! Lazy mommy’s are not good! But i’m she can’t be THAT lazy as it seems you guys are all cared for nicey
It’s true, you cats can do many things…it’s a matter if IF you want to do them!
Love the dress! You look great! I think to say someone is cat or dog like is just shorthand for certain traits and how we respond to that is based on how we see ourselves. I personally would rather be a cat, but I don’t know if that’s how others would see me. Probably more as a mouse.
My Chaos kitty is definitely “dog-like” he’s very social and requires tons of attention. He loves to meet new people, even kids, and to go places (he does get carsick though). It took Harmony a while to get used to his exuberance. This is one of the rare moments when I’m actually alone in my chair. He’ll be back soon no doubt.
As a mouse?! I highly doubt that! I guess we are never happy with how we are or think we are perceived eh?!
That’s so cute that he gets carsick! How can you tell?!
Thanks for the compliment! I love that your cat’s name is Chaos…wonder why..hmmm!
Meanwhile I would DIE for a lapcat but all three of mine are not! Thanks Dionis!
Love the post, but more importantly LOVE LOVE LOVE your photos!! Absolutely Purrrrfect!!! Beautiful Beautiful! 2 paws up!
xo
Aw thanks Kira! They are pics from my 40th birthday party. I had a professional photographer it was super fun!
I can definitely say I am more cat like, then dog. I share their insatiable curiosity of all things. Tend to be more of a loner at times, with the exception of the two cats that follow me everywhere I go, including the bathroom lol. Although, while given the choice over wonder bread or pumpernickle, I would take the wonder bread, as I am one of those who have as yet to aquire the taste.
I would also like to add that you look absolutely amazing in your photo, roar away, crazy, sexy, cat lady.
Hi Brian! I’m sorry I’m only replying to this now! I hate how time gets away from me. Thanks so much for reading I HAVE CAT and for taking the time to leave a post. You are making me blush with your compliments : )
THank you!
I must comment, I say this all the time and NO ONE ever gets what I mean. I have a feeling that is about to change. I have 5 cats and people who aren’t cat people tend to make assumptions about cats. These non cat people meet my cats and say “Well, they just act like dogs!” As if that is a compliment and acting like a cat is somehow bad? Um, what?? No, they act like themselves. Cats and dogs all over the world are unique creatures and they all act different, of course there are similiarities between dogs and similiarities between cats but they are indeed unique. I try to bring it home like this are all people nice and lovable? Typical answer : No, probably not. My reply: well, there are animals like that too so maybe you just haven’t met enough cats. They aren’t all the same.
I can ramble sorry. I really enjoyed your post. It reminds me of how they say no one is purely hetro or homosexual, no one is pure cat or pure dog, we are all somewhere in the middle? Too much? Probably. Keep up the writing, love it!
Hi Shannon! I’m so happy you enjoyed the post! I agree, why do people try to say their cats are good because they act “just like dogs”?! They are both “good” just different!
Ramble on, i love it!
Thanks for the encouragement and yes, i think you are right about no one is just dog or cat – we are a balance – a sliding scale of sorts!
T